I am sick :(

I don know why but I'm having fever now and I find breathing difficult for me.. :( how I wish he was here to hug me.. Anyway we fight today and he is now back in school.. I don't want him to see that girl.. What if one day they really got together I'll be badly hurt and I don't know I can't think about that because I'm gonna trust him and have strong faith in him.. I really hope he don't let me down. I wanna stay strong.. Please, I wanna recover soon.. What if he sees my sick face.. Will he still love me? This is a pic of me hubby.. Hope it doesn't scare you..

4:05 am

Well now I'm laying down and relaxing.. My back kind of hurts and my heart hurts too.. Well I was having a good conversation with him but he didn't know I was somehow sad.. I asked him Amanda or Vivian prettier he chose Amanda but why he cant say you lo honey :) maybe I'm not good enough it's okay.. Another want was I told him "you're a guy you must zao me" then he say "I zao you then who zao me?" I replied find a guy zao u la.. He said "why can't find a girl zao me ah?" fine lo.. :( nvm la.. I'm okay :) but I still enjoyed our conversation tonight anyway.. I love you so much hubby :) muakxxxx! Sweet dreams dear ❤

Finish talking

It's 3:50 now and I'm writing blog in midnight.. Just now we talked and yea we fight but we are okay now. We are happy again.. Actually yes I said I was happy but I'm not really actually hubby.. When you said "I got little bit feelings for her when we fight but when we are okay then no more" means if one day we fight until days no talk you mai will love her? :( I pretend to be happy because I don't want you to think of that girl.. Sorry to fight with you tonight but I'm really unhappy.. I cried my ass off today sorry :( anyway I wanna sleep cause I'm tired and I can't really breath properly.. Sorry.. :) I love you dear.. Goodnight <3

Nothing to say

I'm speechless.. I am not in the mood.. Not happy not feeling okay.. This feeling is killing me!! It sucks!! :( urghhhh why? Please la, treat me right.. I cried enough.. My face is all pale and I just feel so hard to breath..

Today

Well yesterday was our 8 months together I am really happy about that :) we made it so far.. It's not easy at all.. Some people can't even make it to so far but me and my hubby did and i'm proud of him :) today I am really bored and he is at Pulau Pangkor.. Having a family holiday day.. So happy for him.. But today he angry at his dad and he was unhappy he was cursing my future daddy in law.. I'm not that happy because they are old already.. All old people like to grumble I can't tahan too but like what mummy told me "now she wanna here her mother voice also can't" that's why now I learn to record down videos no matter what happen still got this videos to keep as memories :) how much I feel like being around him but I can't.. Today isn't a very good day for me so yea.. But later when strike 12 it's my mummy birthday and I wanna be the first to wish her :) hubby, I'm really happy we made it to 8 months and I love the present you gave me when I get the change to take pretty pictures only I put on FB ya :) thank you so much.. Hope you're enjoying yourself there ya.. Thanks for everything and down there is a picture of us on the night you came :) I love you ! <3

So far, good day

Today so far good day I won RM25 and I was pretty lucky.. Somehow it's like I dont know but I'm really lucky today.. And i got double A's twice :) You can see the pictures below later :) hehe anyway right now I'm waiting him to finish his SA and I'm watching tv.. I'm bored! But he wanna play game.. I no mood cause He forgot our anniversary.. But nvm bah.. His luck :) I'll just enjoy my movie while waiting for him :) I love you hubby!! Win more ya!! <3

Sorry

That's all I have to say.. It hurts me really badly.. I have nothing to say anymore.. I'm left speechless.. Thanks for all those pain..

He is coming!

He is on the way right now and I'm having butterflies in my tummy can't wait to see him man!! :) so happy and feeling lucky.. While waiting for him I was bored so decided to take picture :) hehe here you go hubby a picture of me when I'm bored.. Hope it's not ugly.. :)

Hoping

I am scared that he cant come later.. I really hope that my mummy will let him come over later.. Maybe she won't let, but I am praying hard for him to come.. Now he is playing SA so I'm waiting for him to finish and text me.. Hehe I miss him so much and I'm curious about his present :) haha I wonder what is it.. Hope later can see him la.. I love you!

Chinese New Year

Darling these few days we never spend much time because it's CNY and I know that we still love each other a lot.. Yesterday my friend jasmine came and yea we were talking about love life.. She and her bf 7 months and they broke up because the boyfriend seriously is not a good guy and I'm thankful that me and John almost 8 months and we are still so strong and happy together.. :) I hope this relationship last.. Picture below is one with my aunty and another with my daddy.. Dear hope you think I look pretty :) I love you! <3

Feeling the pain

I know that i am never perfect for you.. Yes I have hearing problems but u don't have to tell your siblings that "she's deft geh!" and shout at me "you fucking deft ahhh?" today because your dad and bro hit your ears you show temper to me I'm sorry I never do anything wrong I don't deserve to get scolding for no reason.. Maybe I am just not good enough.. Why u never think before that when last time I wait for you so long I never scold you like that and why I get for no reason.. Maybe I owe you this my previous life.. Ask Vanessa in the car I was crying thinking why u must scold me.. I came back hug mummy and cry again.. I really can't take it.. I had enough of being soft to you.. I get nothing but scolding.. I have parents too you know.. I try my best get iPhone for your brother because I want your family to accept me and I try my best to get it and I don't mind paying first.. What I get you calling me deft? ;( nvm la I'm never the best.. Sorry I'm broke.. Seriously sorry..

Almost fainted

I called you wanting to let you know I almost fainted but I haven't finish the sentence you say "eh honey, bla bla bla iPhone bla bla bla" when I was having the head cramp so badly.. U called and say sorry I say ah ah ah because not everytime you say sorry I must say its okay.. Is iPhone more important than me?? I have nothing else to say anymore.. I'm sorry I wish that I died.. iPhone is so important to you.. Then it's fine.. I'll still smile like nothings wrong..

What should I say?

Well it's been few days that I've not updated my blog.. These few days a lot of stuff happened in school.. Like Bianca betraying me.. :( maybe I look like I'm okay but I'm not.. These few days I've been moody and I feel sorry for my hubby because he have to cheer me up without failing.. And I'm not feeling really well right now.. My birthday is like 3 days away and I'm sick.. Somehow my feelings are messed up.. I can't trust anyone anymore only for my hubby.. I feel like I'm enough of being betrayed.. It hurts a lot.. Somehow I'll find a way to forget this friendship.. Thank u hubby for always being there for me when I need you.. I'm really sorry recently I'm moody.. I love you dear! <3

Sad :(

Well it's been the whole day he is watching tv and now is like 7:30 he never SMS me or nothing.. Last night he slept early and promised to spend time wit me today.. Today he says sorry again because he never spend time with me.. He never take his word sorry seriously.. If he keeps repeating this one day I'll get bored of hearing sorry and his promises are never kept.. :( what can I do? Nothing that I can do.. It's been an hour he never text me.. I'll wait till he finds me not every time I must start a conversation.. It maybe he is texting someone else and talking to someone else and forgot about me.. He started watching movie since 10 now is 7.. It's been 9 hours not enough ah? I think he really never care about me.. So heart broken.. :( its okay.. Someday he will realize his mistakes.. I don't wanna fight.. Haih.. I miss him but what he know? All he know is movie movie movie !!! Me? Nvm I'm nothing..

4am missing him :)

I miss him so much I really wanna call him and talk to him but I'm sure he is tired so it's okay I'll let him sleep :) we have lots more to talk tomorrow.. I was like sitting on the sofa and I cried thinking all those memories we built.. Every part of my house have memory of him.. Hubby, come back please! Please come back! Honey miss you so much and honey love you most!! Please hubby don't talk to other girls don't flirt :( please honey wanna be yours forever.. Honey wanna marry you!! :) I hope you have sweet dreams about me right now dear.. I'll continue to watch mummy play mah jong.. I love you lots Lao Gong!! Muakxxxx! ❤❤❤

Goodnight

Well tonight I learned how to play contract killer from him and yeap I level upped quite fast :) hehe I'm happy! And he is tired so am I.. I'll have a goodnight rest and hopefully my hubby gets sweet dreams <3 I'm sure that he is tired cause 2 nights he have been keeping me company till like 2 and I'm sure he is tired.. May god bless us to last forever cause I really love him.. I hope everyday I can be happy like that.. Hope my happiness can last forever so that when I'm happy he'll be happy too :) we sang "as long as u love me" together and I'm happy.. Hehe night hubby talk to u tomorrow ya.. I love you!! Muakxxxxx! ❤❤❤

Happy :)

Well just now I was talking to him and I was really happy.. And he calls me "stupid girl" and says that "honey you very cute la".. I'm very happy and also I actually like when he calls me cute I get even happier :) tonight I want to have the happiest conversation.. I hope he will cooperate with me.. Just ate Maggie and I'm full now.. OMG and in the picture my dark circles are huge :( hope he don't mind.. I love you! Now waiting for him to finish his noodles :) bye bye ^_^ hehe

Cheer leading

I feel so bad wanting to dance :( I feel so stupid.. I know I'm so selfish.. I know he love me that's why he don't want me to dance.. I know what he want is for me to be good.. He won't wanna hurt me or anything.. I just feel that I wanna dance not only for red house but I also wanna prove that I can finally win blue.. Yes I'm not a sports person and I'm sure I can't win anything for red house all I can do is dance.. I know I will make my husband really upset and all but I hope he will also understand me.. I have only 2 years and I'm done with secondary.. I just wanna have good memories :) I know he will be sad and all.. He will also keep everything to himself but he don't know I care about him a lot.. Can say almost every hour I check if he updates his blog.. I saw all his recent post.. He really want me to quit cheer leading.. But I know if I quit everyone will look down on me.. I don't want that.. I want to be remembered by school after I leave.. Hubby, I'm truly sorry to hurt you.. I know I'm selfish you can blame me.. Reading your post I cry because I don't feel like you're happy with me.. But I won't give up making you happy.. Cause I truly love you.. I want him to be happy forever.. Someday when u read my blog U will know actually I love you a lot :) but I won't show u know.. Someday I will :) I'm so so sorry about the dance and I'm so so sorry to make u sad about it.. And for the first time u text me So much and for the first time i got 5 miss call from you.. My phone was on silent and I was sleeping.. I am so sorry about that too.. :( I know I am not perfect and I never ever chose Dancing over YOU! Because you are my everything.. Reason why i wanna win blue is because your ex are in blue house is Leey Shiaan is there, shir li was ex blue member, Helen.. So yes I wanna win blue to show I'm better than them and I got the man they can't have.. I'm sorry I never tell you but you will know someday right hubby? Sorry.. :( I LOVE YOU FOREVER HUBBY!! Muakxxxxx!

Crazy In Love

Somehow I love him more and more each day.. For the first time i cry because he go tuition.. I miss him so so so much.. I don't know why I cry because he go tuition but what I do know is I love him a lot and I hope our love can last forever.. I really miss him la how? I wanna hear his voice la.. I miss you.. I know maybe he thinks I am mean and stuff but actually I am just to over protective and too selfish.. I love you a lot hubby :) Wo Ai Ni!

:)

Just had an sweet and amazing conversation with him.. I can sleep in peace now.. :) nite baby boy.. I love you!

Missing Him :(

Well just now we kinda argued for small stuff but I am really patient already :) I never wanna fight and i said sorry.. I feel that for him I can change.. I wanna be his perfect wife.. I want him to know he have someone who loves him so much that he never knew.. I am sure that with him my life is a bed of roses maybe at times got thorns that might hurt but we are still together forever.. That's one thing I believe.. With him nothing is impossible.. I hope one day when he see this blog he will know how much he mean to me :) I Love You! Muakxxxx! Don't we look perfect together? I say YES ! :)

Love?

You said you you'll be understanding.. I said I wanna dance because red house is seriously lack of people.. I promise to still spend time with u.. You? Go swimming show off to the girls.. My feelings? U care? :( I so long I control my temper.. I saw pics of u and other girls on FB I keep quite I don't wanna fight, if I fight u will say I not understanding enough.. If I don't make noise you become too much.. Why do this to me? I'm sick!!! :( why u never care?? Tears are coming down in the painful way.. I'll continue to tolerate you because no matter what I love you! I'm sorry I just wish the virus I have will not have any medicine to cure..

My Baby Boy Sleeping

Well today we did not talk because he is tired and when I call him he was already sleeping so it's okay.. As long as he never talk to other girls I'm happy enough.. :) anyway tonight I'll sleep in peace cause I know how he feels about me.. I hope tomorrow when I go to doctor, he will say I'm okay and can stop medication.. I really hope so :) goodnight baby boy! Sweet dreams :) see honey take pic hopefully u have a sweet dream of me. I Love You!! ❤

He finally let me read his blog

Well I read my dearest baby boy blog and he is really my stupid boy I so love him will fall for another guy meh? Stupid boy betul la u dear :) well he don't know I have this blog haha :) and yea I'm still sick not recovered yet.. But reading his blog made me really happy.. I know he loves me and I still love him most :) I cried reading his blog because not many guys will write a blog for their gf and he did and yeap! I'm his wife!! I wanna tell him now that I truly love you until I die :) one day he will know I love him like a crazy girl from lala land... Haha Lao Gong Wo Ai Si Ni oh!!!

Sick :(

I'm sure he don't know how I look like.. I'm suffering in pain.. I'm so so so scared anything will happen to me.. :( i just finish talking to him and I feel my voice is freaky.. I'm afraid he will get scares due to my voice so I don't wanna talk much.. I'm so scared he will leave me because I keep getting sick :( i really hope he will go through with me everything ❤ I love you!

I am sick

Somehow I really hate being sick.. I went to the doctor and they can't detect what virus I have :( am I going to die soon ? :( I really don't wanna go.. I have to go check either tonight or tomorrow again.. I'm really afraid.. If it won't get better I'll be on pills for 1 week and each day I have to take 5 times medication.. Gosh, please help me.. I don't like taking pills please!!! :(

I miss him!

Somehow I miss him a lot.. We fight today! :( about some small thing and I guess he don't really trust me.. Haih.. :( I'm sick now and he don't really care.. I'm really sad :( but he don't really know.. I wish that he understands how I feel.. One day I hope he realize that I'm really important to him.. One day he will regret for what he have done to me.. :( just waiting for the one day for him to realize.. I love him now and forever!!